You're the first and only! Good for you?
Thorough is right. This could take hours.
Anything worthwhile is worth working for.
She's so considerate.
Oddly, you find yourself taking her
to more and more public places.
You disgust her.
Shouldn't you do everything you can to help her excel?
Just think how red your face will be when someone catches you,
and your girlfriend yells, "Help! There's a pervert kissing my ass!"
That darn thing just won't stay straight!
A sorority's live-in asskisser's work is never done...